Does this mean I officially need help?

They say the first step toward recovery is admitting you've got a problem. Well, I'm not sure I have a problem, but if my lovely children have anything to say about it, I'm due at Dr. Drew's rehab house tomorrow.

Example #1 - JAM was invited out for the day with a friend and her Mom on a trip to the Air and Space Museum out at Dulles. Apparently a good time was had by all, and a funny story came home with them. Have you ever heard the song "Down by the Bay?" The version we know is sung by Raffi.

Witness...

So JAM comes home and tells us that the three of them were waiting in line for something and ended up singing this song but making up silly lyrics to go with it. "Have you ever seen a moose, kissing a goose" and stuff like that. What could possibly make this story fit in with my intro and my impending committal? One of JAM's lines? "Have you ever seen a notch, drinking some scotch?" Oh lordy. How proud were we that we taught him that line from Anchorman? You know the one... "Lamp! I love lamp!" We twisted that a bit and the joke around the house became "What does Daddy like? Scotch!" Oh yes, we're so proud. And JAM has decided to spread it for all the world to hear.



Example #2 -
I'm out on our back patio, doin' man stuff - you know, grillin' some meat for dinner - when Wifey asks me what I would like to drink for dinner. After the whole ceiling debacle, I thought a beer might hit the spot. So, as my lovely bride is taking a beautiful, refreshing cold Killians out of the fridge for me my little man Pudge points to it and with a huge smile on his face yells - "Dada!"

Yes, my one year old beautiful, innocent little boy has now associated his father with the tall bottle of the Gods.

I've got my bags packed. Feel free to call child services whenever you want.

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